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     As technology advances and we become a less textile based society, our jobs gravitate to the service industries. In short, customer service jobs. Your restaurant positions, retail sales of everything from clothes to cars, technical assistance, even the skilled trades like plumbers and medical staff. All of it centers around customer service. In short, the ability to provide a service for the public and be nice about it in the process.

     Some people should not have these jobs. And for the most part, these people are either smart enough not to get them or their employers are smart enough not to let them keep them very long. But on the other side of the fence, some people just shouldn't be served.

     Full disclosure: every job I have ever had requires me to deal with the public, at least in small doses. Most of them actually center around me dealing with the public every moment I'm on duty, and usually even when I'm not officially on duty. Because of this, I get to see a lot of people in a lot of different situations. I have also learned how to be a good customer.

     I've discussed the "asshole fee" before. This is real. If you've never worked a customer service job, you have probably never heard of it. If you have, you may have heard it called different names but if there's any way under the sun to charge it, you have. And you only charged the assholes who deserved to pay it, hopefully.

     Now, we all have days where we are assholes. All of us. We can't help it. We wake up, find dog piss on the carpet, the coffee maker breaks, we get stuck in traffic, our kids are brats, and every once in a while it all builds up and we become assholes. Usually just for a little while, and most of us are smart enough to avoid people during this time. But I'm referring here to the people who are just everyday assholes by nature. You've met them; they're the ones always running around bitching about bad service. 

     As I said, I have learned to be a good customer. I also almost invariably get great customer service. Cashiers are quick, friendly, and efficient. Wait staff is observant and caring. Salespeople are attentive without being pushy. Even the Taco Bell drive thru employees will apologize if the food takes a few minutes to prepare. (They couldn't just be saying that to make me stop singing, either. I can rock Pink like nobody's business!) So whenever I hear someone complain that wherever they go they get bad service, I am left to assume that it must be them. I have yet to be proven wrong.

     Think about it. If you are a nice, friendly person, other people are generally nice and friendly back. Unless they are having an asshole day. It's the same if they are being paid to deal with you. If you walk in with an attitude, they aren't going to want to be as nice to you. If you walk in with a smile, they will usually give it back. Hopefully, they won't even spit in your food. 

     I actually do get it when people have never worked customer service jobs before. They've never lived it, they just don't know. What I don't get is when people who should know better are bad customers. I knew a woman who waited tables in high school and to work her way through college. She continued on to get a career and family, and apparently forget how hard her previous job was! I was quite frightened to eat in a restaurant with this woman. She complained about the table, she demanded special food not on the menu, she made the server make different trips for each item. (Can we get a new fork? Thank you, can I get a refill? Thank you, we need more sugar. Thank you, can we get some steak sauce?) I have always been honest about the fact I would be the worst waitress in the world. But even a good one would break under this kind of pressure! 

     There is also something about human nature that makes a person standing on the other side of any type of counter or desk somehow become not human. And it's even more pronounced if they are on the other end of a phone. Just because someone's wearing a uniform and standing behind a counter does not mean they are not a person. It is not OK to be rude to them. It is not OK to yell at them or expect miracles from them or threaten them. It is not OK to feel you are better than them. You are not.  In fact, if they can handle dealing with your stupid rude ass without hopping across the counter and smacking you, they are better than you. You should thank them for performing their job, not make it harder for them.

     I am under the opinion that every person's first job should be something minimum wage and dealing with the public. You learn that the hardest jobs pay the least amount of money. You learn how to deal with the assholes without losing your cool. You learn how to get along with your fellow dregs of society and work together to make life better. Most important, you learn who to hate. You learn to hate the dickheads who just can't seem to order what they want. You learn to hate the bitches who are never happy, even when you do everything right. Hopefully, you also learn how not to be one of these people. You see, good people in rant land, for the most part you get what you give. Now go out there and be nice. And if you really don't want fries with that, a simple "No, thank you" will suffice.